9.24.2007

Max’s Harem

During our honeymoon cruise, Max and I spent every night salsa dancing at Boleros, a Latin lounge featured on select Royal Caribbean ships. And because we were regular fixtures there, we met many other passengers, who also frequented the club.

The Garcia’s (with a tall, elegant husband, beautiful wife, and three statuesque, 20-something, daughters) joined our group of newfound friends. But even though the entire clan hailed from Latin America, not a one knew how to dance salsa.

So it didn’t seem odd that on our last night, as Max and I danced away, husband Baltazar Garcia approached and asked if we’d be willing to give he and his family an impromptu lesson. We happily obliged.

At first, we tried to demonstrate the basic step and turns. However, when my husband and I saw the family struggling, we decided to switch off partners. Max danced with the mother and daughters; I danced with Baltazar.

Our impromptu lesson over, I headed back to our table of other friends. Cindy, also a newlywed, addressed me under her breath.

“You’re a better woman than I am,” she said sharply.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Those women (the Garcia daughters) are gorgeous. I wouldn’t let my husband near them,” she explained. “You’re not bothered if Max dances with another woman?’

“Not at all.” I responded. “I wouldn’t have married Max if I had any doubts about his character.”

And with those few words, the conversation ended. Cindy may have felt that I was being naïve, but I am wise to the problems of infidelity. She couldn’t know I’ve previously experienced two unfaithful husbands.

But what Cindy also didn’t know is I am use to seeing my husband socialize with beautiful women. He owned a modeling and talent agency several years ago and has maintained lasting friendships with both former employees and clients. And even if Max hadn’t been ‘in the industry,’ he would still have lots of women friends. In fact, half the people invited to our small wedding of twenty five were Max’s very best friends—and all female.

I often get asked if this bothers me. But to be honest, I consider it a sign of Max’s good character. He never dated or slept with any of his women friends. The relationships stayed plutonic before I was in his life. Why would I worry now? Max appreciates good conversation. He knows fine wine, likes to shop, and thinks the Houston Astros play football. In other words, he is every woman’s favorite, non-gay, male friend. It would be pointless of me to try and fight nature.

And why would I? My husband’s friends have all become my close personal friends,too. And my friends have also become Max’s friends’ friends. Sometimes, we all party together. And when we do, Max tags along— like the master of his own personal harem. But so long as I stay his “head wife,” I won’t have any issues. Would you?

10 comments:

Tiffany Fairbanks said...

I think it's wonderful to have a man that your lady friends can appreciate. I really admire that you can drop the past and not blame him for what others have done in the past.

Anonymous said...

I dont know how old 'Cindy' was but I am willing to bet that she was younger.

One thing I know about getting older is that you know when you know and all doubt goes out the window. We're more comfortable with ourselves and things like jealousy seem to fade, along with our youth.

And I am not one bit sorry about that. At all.

You go Diane. You give me hope that there ARE some smart women out there afterall and that I am not the only one ;o)

Neal said...

If you ever need somebody to corral the statuesque 20-something daughters, give me a call...

You can't go around shielding your partner from every pretty girl any more than he can shield you from every handsome man. That's poison.

Bluepaintred said...

I want a harem. One that does toilets and windows.

Dan-E said...

i'm with neal. if you need any help with the 20-somethings, or if any of max's female friends are single, late 20s, and likes men who play guitar, loves sports, and won't mind that he's a waiter/bartender, send 'em my way.

"...thinks the Houston Astros play football..." this made me laugh out loud. lucky for you two that you're relocating to germany and not texas.

LZ Blogger said...

I knew that Max was a lucky guy... but now I know he's lucky in more than just one way! ~ jb///

Anonymous said...

Are any of the "statuesque 20-something daughters" in those photos? Because you're by far the most beautiful -- what made droopy boobs pick that dress??? Yikes! More coverage would be good for her. Good that you know that trust is a cornerstone of the relationship. I don't think you can ever ignore the possibility that it could happen and every relationship should hopefully keep each partner satisfied, but I don't think you have to worry with Max!

Diane Mandy said...

Anon-HAHAH! Youa re too funny. the Garcia girls weren't pictured.

AmyB said...

Wait, the Houston Astros *don't* play football??!! ;o)

I think this is a prime example of a mature, healthy relationship, one that oftentimes can't be had earlier in life (or in our 20's). Ten years ago, I wouldn't have been able to stomach seeing so many women admire and befriend my own fiance' but now I only take it as a compliment that it is ME he wants to have in his life for life.

Good for you for having such a great outlook about this and for also possible teaching this Cindy a valuable little lesson. So smooth, you are. :o)

Me said...

I also think you two have a great healthy relationship and of course you trust him, why wouldn"t you. :)