French Twist

After waking up with a terrible hangover this morning, I started thinking about giving up my love affair with French martinis for a while, well at least through the weekend.

Then, I went to my computer and had this e-mail waiting in my Inbox.

Hey Diane,

I finally cleaned out my purse and I found my husband card with your number and email address. I figured I would say hello and wonder if you remember me. I dont remember much that night but my husband just finished telling me about it. We met at ... back in April after 230am I think when all the bars were closing. I was drunk(a drunk red head with a spainsh/italian guy) but I do remember me hitting on you.

I am really sorry if I made you uncomfortable or embrassed you in front of your friend from Washington DC, thats what my husband told me he was from. I guess my ideas was coming from a good place...

Anyway, if your too busy to respond I will understand. But if you feel like hanging out with us please feel free to email me back. We just moved here since I am going back to school in August. Hope to hear from you

Take Care


I remember that night four long months ago. I was out on the town with a male friend who was visiting from France. (Not from DC... Nice try, Catrina.) I remember the couple, extremely friendly toward me and obviously drunk. After repeated attempts to continue their evening with me, I offered my e-mail in desperate attempt to get away politely. I wasn't quick witted enough during those wee hours of the morning to come up with an invented e-mail address. Although in their condition, I did not expect them to remember anything the next morning.

This isn't my first experience with being propositioned by a swinger. At a very proper, southern wedding one month later, my date and I were not so subtly informed by another intoxicated woman that she was most interested in a ménage a trios with both him and me. The evening ended, she was passed out, and her date was left to find a taxi home.

I absorb all of this and wonder how people handle multiple relationships. I know I am not an orgy sort of girl. I can't seem to make it work on a one and one setting. How in the world do couples make things work when they bring singles and doubles into the relationship?

One man I dated briefly admitted to me that he had experienced a threesome back in his college days.

"How was it?" I asked.
"Honestly, it was a distracting," he replied.

I can only imagine. I think if I found myself in that situation, I too would find it "distracting." With so much happening at one time, it would be hard decide what exactly to do next. But, I digress.

These recent experiences also make me wonder how much of a role alcohol played in both my propositions. Both women were clearly intoxicated at the time of the proposals to me. Which, of course, all takes me back to whether or not I should end my love affair with the French martini? It's sort of my menage a trios drink. It's been right there-- before, during, and at the end of all my recent relationships.

I'm starting to see a pattern in this post. Everything is becoming all too clear as I emerge from my hangover. French word, French guy, French martini...Oh the irony of it all! I've come to a decision. For now, I'll keep the French martinis and stay clear of any menage a trios that may come my way.


queenofsass said...


I think it is more the company you have been keeping than the French martinis. Mr. Hotty McHot sent out kinky vibes like sunbeams--and he was your companion at the wedding.

Maybe I need to change my mind--I was with you one night when another drunk lady (she was with her brother) hit on you and followed us to Bogarts. I **certainly** don't send out vibes like that.

Wink wink

David said...

Well now