2.20.2008

Far, but not far enough

Most days, Max and I feel so very far away from it all. On rare occasion, we wish we could get a little further.

Last night provided one of those moments.

Max and I decided to start a salsa class in a nearby town. We figured it would be a little awkward, more than likely taught in German, and with a bunch of people we didn’t know. But we were only partially correct.

As it turns out, Max had no sooner taken off his coat than a woman squealed with the greatest enthusiasm.

“Oh my God! Max, what are YOU doing here in Germany?”

I’ve rarely ever seen Max taken aback, but on this occasion and for a split second, he was.

“Oh…hey. How are you, Theresa. Let me introduce you to my wife,” Max replied quickly.

I smiled, shook Theresa’s hand, and made pleasantries. I could also tell my presence didn’t register with her. She asked me if I lived in Germany. I told her Max and I had moved here together in December.

But our conversation was cut short because class began. During the next hour, my husband and I feverishly worked on learning a new turn pattern and thoroughly enjoyed the program. Before we knew it, the lesson was over.

After class, Max attempted to make a quick get away, but Theresa stood between him and the door. We quickly chatted once again. I learned she had done an internship with Max’s company four years earlier and returned to Germany once the program ended. She now worked as a full-fledged staff member in an office about 20 miles away. Still unclear who I was, Theresa asked if I also worked with the company.

“No, I gave up my career when we moved here,” I said.

“So, you live here, too?” she asked, completely clueless.

“Yes, Max and I are married, and we moved here together in December.” Did I have to spell it out for her again?

“Oh, you’re MARRIED,” she replied with a look of full recognition finally showing on her face. “How long have you been married?”

“We’re newlyweds,” I beamed. “We just got married in June.”

After this exchange, it didn’t take too many more sentences to finish our conversation. We exchanged goodbyes and headed to the car.

I decided to give my husband the time it took to walk to the Mini to fess up to the obvious. However, Max didn’t begin the conversation, and I quickly cut to the chase.

“So, you and Theresa dated.”

“Yes… about four years ago… for a few months before she returned to Germany. I haven’t seen her since.” Then, he felt compelled to add, “It was never anything serious.”

“…But you slept with her.” I responded

“Uh…yeah. How did you know?”

I chuckled at Max’s ignorance in these matters. It was obvious by Theresa’s reaction to both Max and to me that there had once been something between them. Women can discern these sorts of things, you know.

Amazingly in all our 2 ½ years together, Max and I had never run into any of our old flames. Moreover, back when we were dating we agreed not to discuss our ‘ex files’ too much. We reasoned what was in our pasts shouldn’t matter in our present. Besides, Max has a past; I have a past. Meeting Theresa, while awkward, didn’t faze me in the least. But I also thought it funny and ironic that it took moving thousands of miles for me to finally meet one of his old girlfriends, not to mention one that is in our five-week salsa class!

27 comments:

utenzi said...

That's pushing coincidence pretty far, Diane. You'd figure moving to another country would eliminate that sorta awkward meeting. I'm glad you both were able to escape unscathed. Good luck with the subsequent classes.

running42k said...

great story.

Sizzle said...

how ironic!

she seemed pretty clueless at the beginning. no wonder you had to repeat it. we ladies, we can smell that kind of thing on one another can't we? it's like we have a language men can't interpret.

egan said...

Okay, I have to ask you something. Why did you ask Max about the sex part?

Suvii said...

Too funny!!!! And indeed what a small world we live in, no??? No offense to Max, but she sounded a little dingy, but maybe she was just taken aback???

Diane Mandy said...

Good question. I think it was a knee jerk reaction to the"but it wasn't serious" tag line he felt compelled to offer. Then, after the "How did you know" we both started laughing. It was a good natured and interesting exchange. We've never been in that situation before.

Rositta said...

That's hilarious, I met one of my sweeties past romances in Greece last summer and he had a similar reaction. I think women can pull this off better than men...ciao

Diane Mandy said...

Hey Su- Yeah, she was just floored to see him. I got the impression a flood a memories came back and she was still collecting herself. There was no offense taken. We'll see how next week goes.

Diane Mandy said...

Rositta- I hope I NEVER have to test that theory. I got no poker face, which is why I scrutinize other's.

AmyD said...

Good Lord, it's a small world, after all! ;o)

I chuckled just thinking about how great of a dancer you are, and how burned up Theresa must have been/will be during your class.

Indeed, the past is most definitely in the past...until you re-meet it in a salsa class. Ha!

egan said...

Okay, thanks for answering my question. I found it a bit odd you'd ask given you agreed not to mention past "stuff". The good thing is you were able to laugh it off.

I guess when discussing past relationships with my wife, I always assume she was "intimate" with that person... whatever that means.

Diane Mandy said...

Egan- We didn't agree to NEVER to mention it, but we agreed when it came to this topic we wouldn't beat a dead horse. I wasn't using a whip, but my comment was more like a a swift kick in the rump. :-) He will forever know that "Nothing serious" will not be equated with "I didn't see her naked."

Dustin said...

God - it's moments like that I'm convinced the world is significantly smaller than we've been lead to believe.

Kimberly said...

Wow - what a small world!!! That salsa class sounds really fun. I'd love to do something like that :)

Anonymous said...

Oh that's hilarious! At least you know she's not stalking him since he's the one who came to Germany later. So... how did she compare? I have seen one of my honey's exes in person and one in photos (and he has seen one of mine in person -- awkward run-in outside a grocery store) and my reaction is to compare myself. The one in the pics was much thinner than me (she was wearing some god-awful skin-tight pink number for the 80s, so it was easy to see), and taller, but I have better skin. The one I met in person had no chin and was short (not to mention a raging btch...) and older than me (and older than him!), so I think I would generally beat her in a sexy contest. I'm not sure about the one from the pics -- she might win, but the bottom line is that I've got him now, I'm perfectly happy and we're planning to be together forever. But I thought it was funny that guys do the same thing (or at least my guy does). After he met my ex at the grocery store and we got home he said "I'm a lot hotter than him." And he's right.

Diane Mandy said...

Anonymous - I found her to be quite pretty, long brunette hair, close to my height and weight. And I found her attractiveness to be oddly comforting. Weird, huh? But beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right? Al I know is I'd be a much better scrabble player.

Rhonda said...

I love your blog design and graphics! Very refreshing and delightful. I also love that story and you can't help but wonder how things might unfold over the next few weeks! Please keep us posted.
Rhonda

eusmaca said...

Ahhh, the meeting of the ex. I got mine coming... as in next friday.

By a twist of fate, I been invited to the wedding of one of my best friends, who happens to be the best of friends with my ex (he actually was the person that introduce us to each other). He will be there with his new wife.. who happens to hate my guts, since I stayed very good friends with him after the break up... eventually she gave him an ultimatum (her and my friendship), he crumbled and now will have to face me during this bit of festivities.

I, will have the best looking man on my arm, who will wine and dance me through out the night, making sure there is no question as to who he is in my life.

I'm actually looking forward to this upcoming drama.

kenju said...

I know exactly how that felt, since I have a similar story. We were on our honeymoon (beach) and eating breakfast in an inn when two squealing girls ran up to mr. kenju, calling his name. He quickly said, "Let me introduce you to my wife..." and their faces fell about 2 feet and they beat a hasty retreat after checking me out up and down. It happened another time, before we married, in a bar. One of the waitresses had obviously been involved with him and I would have been dead if looks could kill. Your knowing that they had been intimate is priceless - as was mine. Take solace in the fact that you won....
LOL

Lynda said...

Yikes - the ex-girlfriend in Germany. I did this too, only I couldn't speak German at the time and my brand new mother in law greeted miss ex-girlfriend like a long lost child (I personally wanted to kill her) my hubby just did the old 'well what do you want me to do?' face. I think you handled it well!! And wow - you are brave to jump into salsa lesson.

karey m. said...

aargh! SUCH a painful moment! i HATE it when reality creeps in to my life, you know?

and, rest assured...i'm sure her mother has never asked her if she was going to appear on a porn site! yes, i am STILL laughing about that one.

Tenacious B said...

I think it's funny, because it seemed the universe was screwing with him a helluva lot more than it was with you.

And you're a woman, you have 6-month window to use this in a random argument. Congrats!

Caffienated Cowgirl said...

Oh man...a potentially bad situation...only made better, of course, by saying that you're married :)

egan said...

Okay, got it. No more beating a dead horse. I didn't mean to make it sound like I was putting words in your mouth. Bygones.

Carol said...

I am SOOOO putting you on my GoogleReader list! :-)

Carol

ms chica said...

Never underestimate the power of irony or the unlikeliness of statistics.

If I placed in similar circumstances, I would have been equally amused.

Sueellen said...

OK that is hilarious! She really did seem clueless over who you were! LOL